“Failing to plan, is planning to fail” as they say. I believe this principle should also be applied when looking to start a family (I like to call it an empire).
“Failing to plan, is planning to fail”
Resources
When it comes to starting a family two of our precious resources will be heavily required (I’m sure there are many more)
1. Money
2. Time
Money
When my wife and I decided to bring someone into the world we knew that this would come with its associated costs. Apparently raising kids is expensive!
Did you know that it costs approximately the following amounts to raise a child up till the age of 18 in the UK:
– Boys: £79,176
– Girls: £108,884
source: moneysupermarket.com
Yep..My jaw dropped too.
Our Stage
My wife and I are currently at the early stages of our family cycle- “baby gear stage”. Our daughter is within the 0 – 3 years old category and the average costs for this age category is £5,667. When we announced that we were expecting a girl we were very fortunate to receive gifts in abundance from family and friends. We hosted a baby shower and had a gift registry whereby people could purchase listed items for us. Upon the arrival of our daughter we received further gifts from friends and family, this helped us save thousands albeit we had already budgeted for these items. We are very appreciative to those people; every penny counts! The car seat was the first thing on our list of things to buy. In the U.K. this is said to be the safest way to travel with a newborn.
The gifts included nappies (roughly six months supply!), wipes, sleep suits, baby vests, towels, Mamaroo to name a few. As well as helping us to save money, this helped us focus our attention on other things such as decorating our daughter’s room, assembling her cot etc.
Time
“Time is our most precious commodity”
Maternity & Paternity leave
My wife was in a permanent position and I was contracting; she was entitled to maternity leave whilst I was only entitled to a two statutory paternity leave. She managed to accumulate a significant amount of annual leave to add to her maternity leave to make it longer. Statutory Paternity Pay, for eligible employees, this is the lower amount of either £151.20 a week or 90% of their average weekly earnings; in my case it would have been £151.20 per week.
I was caught in two minds. Do I forgo my statutory entitlement and continue to work earning contract money or do I claim the statutory entitlement and forgo work?
I called a few friends who were fathers and asked them for their advice. The consensus from my friends who are fathers was that I should go to work as my mother-in-law was scheduled to stay at ours for two weeks and apparently babies spend a significant amount of time sleeping. The consensus from the wives of my friends who are fathers was that I should stay at home, more so for the emotional support from me to my wife. I never considered this from the mothers perspective… at that point I considered staying at home with my wife.
I was very fortunate as my manager, at the time, allowed me to work from home for those two weeks, enabling me to bond with my daughter and support my wife without losing a penny :D.
My wife has used her maternity leave to connect with other mothers, attend baby sensory classes and other activities (before the lockdown) that aids our daughters development and most importantly taking care of her mental well being!
The Future
It’s good to continue planning and considering life after maternity & paternity leave. Things to consider may be aspects such as:
– Childcare
– Nursery
– Reducing working hours (Full Time to Part Time)
– Being a stay at home mum or dad
At this moment in time my wife and I are very fortunate to live fairly close to our families and we have the option of receiving their help on a regular basis. This can help free up some more time for other things like spending more time together as a couple.
What strategies do you have in mind when you decide to start your family?
Until next time
K.
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